I second the name

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Finally today, after a couple weeks of postponing, I was able to go to the bank with my money in hopes of opening a dollar account. I brought with me a 1x1 picture as was required and 2 forms of identification. I brought my driver's license (something I never use because I don't drive) and my passport with a picture of me having a fat lip. The fat lip came because of an allergic reaction I had to using an expired lip balm. I would've cared to peel off the laminate and exchange it with a new picture if only that were legal. Anyway, after partially filling out the form with my name and other such pertinents as permanent address and gender, the lady behind the marble counter top told me her supervisor advised her that I couldn't push through with the application. It seems that on my 2nd name does not appear on my passport, whereas it does on my driver's license. That was the cause of the stir. It's gotten me into a bit of confusion before, but I had never been turned down because of it.
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"Lady, I'm here with my dollars. I am NOT a Chinese smuggler or drug lord. If I were, do you think I'd even be going to this obscure bank with an amount that wouldn't even buy me Gucci loafers." I ended up buying 3 collared tees and a pair of slacks just to make myself feel better. They were on sale and I got 4 50-buck coupons for use on my next purchase! Fair trade.
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Now that I contemplate the events in my peanut butter & oatmeal happy brain, had Edgar Allan Poe not have Allan in his name, he could've been any other writer and The Raven could have been written by some other famous noir writer in a parallel universe. Come to think of it, if I keep writing only my first and last name on every identifying document I have, I would always be plagued by people asking if this so-and-so criminal is my father or uncle.
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It's gettin' old. The joke, not me. ;)
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